Without due care and attention relationships can often become stale and partners can become stuck in unhelpful patterns of behaviour. Sometimes events such as an affair, critical illness or children leaving home can bring relationship difficulties to a head and make the questions “do I really love my husband/wife/partner?” and “do I really want to stay in this relationship?” come to the forefront.
Couples therapy may well be helpful in these cases. It can serve to clarify your shared purpose and the behaviours that will take you towards that purpose, as well as identifying the thoughts, feelings and memories that arise and get in the way.
For couples therapy to be helpful there has to be a shared desire for change and a willingness to make those changes – and implicit in that is a shared responsibility for the relationship to date.
My normal approach is to meet both people together for a shared session, then to have one or two individual sessions with each of you and then a final shared session.
Please do contact me if you would like to discuss this further. I work with LGBTQ as well as straight relationships.